use my crayons, matte

How nice of you! I don't mind if I do.

[coloring taking place]

I like coloring. Probably not as much as I like playing with legos or building blocks.

Yes, I like "childhood toys." I like playing. I like games, I like building things. Is there a crime in that?

There is? Federal Statute #7583? Wow! Who knew I have been in violation of a little known law that requires all citizens of the United States of America to act their age.

You'd think this Statute would be a little more well known. We've all wished that some people or other would "just grow up" or "act their age." Now we can threaten to let the FBI know about them.

Ah the fun we'll have, turning in our friends and neighbors. We'll finally have a world where the 25 years old act like their 25, and 62 year olds will act like their 62. We won't see 12 year olds trying to graduate from college, nor will we see men well past the age of retirement trying to run for President of the United States.

And we better watch out, if one of them does run and no one calls them on it, they might just get into the White House and change that Statutue with an Executive Order. And we all know what would happen then!

Yes, the world would go to hell in a handbasket. One of those paisley ones with the tassles. Yes, kind of like that one at Bloomingdales we saw last weekend.