skinny little white boy

I think someone has been peaking at my webcam again.

So you think I am skinny, eh? Well, you didn't know me when I was the size of a medium-size wrestler. Yes, I was. And I am proud to say, I managed to get down to this current lanky form by plenty of hard work and a special diet of foods with holes in the center.

Yes, that's right. I am international spokesman for the Hole in the Middle Diets (& Fashion Apparel). It's a relatively new diet. Scientists found out about the weight loss characteristics of foods with holes cut out of the center of them.

Now I know what you're thinking, but it's not that easy. No, it's not because these foods are missing actual, well, food, that makes them great for weight loss. It much more complex then that.

And that's why I have a patent out on the explanation of it. See, I wasn't smart or fast enough to get a patent on the actual diet or the process of taking food out of the center of food, but I did manage to get the patent for the explanation.

So rather than share that explanation right here and risk the PTO thinking I've put it in the public domain, I will keep it all under wraps and just reassure you that it does in fact work.

What I advise, without explaining much in the way of what it does, is to go out and buy a box of donuts, some lifesavers, a bagel or two, perhaps even some of those fudge-striped cookies and make yourself a meal. Now, don't get the wrong idea, just because a food has holes in it does not mean it will work. Swiss cheese, for example, will not help you loose weight. See, it has holes all over, but not just in the center. This won't work. Once again, with out explaining anything, I can just say that the weight-loss components are not present in the right amount and arrangement in food like swiss cheese which merely has holes but not in the center.

With that said, please hurry on over to www.holesinthecenterofmyfood.com and buy the explanation to this wonderful diet. The first 100 people will get a coupon for Dunkin Donuts.

Enjoy!